Teaching by Gerry Dee

Author:Gerry Dee [Dee, Gerry]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-0-385-67746-2
Publisher: Doubleday Canada
Published: 2012-10-22T16:00:00+00:00

Teaching sex educution is about as awkward as it gets. It’s bad for the students, but it’s awkward for the teachers, too. I was a phys. ed. teacher, so I inevitably got stuck teaching health and sex education as part of my courses. When it came to things about girls’ and boys’ bodies, I was always aware of how embarrassing all those changes that happen at puberty can be. The last thing I wanted to do as a teacher was to have to point them out and talk about them. But that was, in a way, my job. I tried to avoid using the kids as examples, but that didn’t stop me from imagining hilarious scenarios where I’d address the kids directly.

“Okay, you guys want to learn sex ed., right?”

Some timid nods.

“Great, so the only way to do that is for all of us to open up together. You’re going to answer my questions and I’m going to answer yours. That’s the way it’s going to be, because we have to be honest, right?”

Some heads went down. Some stared up at the ceiling tiles.

“Okay, girls. Who in here has started their period? … What? No one? No one in here has started her period? That’s a little hard to believe. Julie, aren’t you, like, eighteen years old? You’ve got your period, haven’t you?”

Then there were the junior coed classes. I could have asked something pretty safe, something like, “Who in this class has noticed the development of breasts? Anyone? Jennifer? I notice that you’ve started to develop. You’re one of the first girls in the class to get breasts. Good for you! What? You’re embarrassed. I get that. But developing breasts is completely natural and normal.”

It might have been funny, but I’m pretty sure I would have lost my job if I’d done anything like that. In the boys’ classes, I could actually afford to make a few jokes without being fired. I once asked, “Okay, guys. I want you to raise your hand if you’ve started to masturbate. And who has pubic hair? Anyone? Am I the only one in this class who has pubic hair?”

Teaching sex education at a Catholic school was the most hypocritical feeling in the world. All the things I was telling the kids not to do were things I’d done. And I’m not just talking about intimate issues here. I’d be teaching the kids about the importance of healthy eating and making sure to eat enough fruits and vegetables every day, right after I’d eaten two hamburgers, some fries and a milkshake for lunch.

I had a Grade 6 kid in sex ed. class who caught me totally off guard once.

“Sir, what’s oral sex?”

Uh-oh.

“Excellent question,” I said. “Oral sex is … talking about sex. That’s what we’re doing right now. You asked a question about sex … and we’re talking about it. See how that works? No big deal. This is oral sex.”

“So, sir, right now we’re having oral sex?”

“Yes.” And time to move on.

Everything I taught about sex was an elaborate attempt for me not to lie directly.

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